My Big Sis (and mom and two old college roomies) hosted a wedding shower for me today. It was completely wonderful. There were vases and vases of fresh flowers, which I totally love. Tons of good homemade food. Fantastic people. And a good reason to celebrate.
It’s one of those instances where I totally enjoyed the day, I was thrilled to see my friends and family members,……..and I had this surreal feeling – like I wasn’t quite sure why everyone was gathered at my mom’s house at the same time. Towards the end of the day, someone said “That was a nice bridal shower,” and I just looked at her in surprise. A what?! Oh yeahhhhh…..that’s what everyone was doing here. It sounded almost like a foreign word when applied to me. It’s kind of like when I tried on one veil after many wedding dresses. For some reason, seeing a veil on top of my head zapped my brain cells. I think I was in a haze while my sister planned this shower. So much so I can think of a couple of people I absolutely should have invited who never got an invite. Oooops. Also, I was probably a bad bride today and didn’t spend enough time mingling with everyone. But, again, I think I was forgetting the reason why everyone was here.
So, I have a confession to make.
I (this is not the confession) really, really dislike excessive self-deprecation, so I’m going to try not to overdo it here. But (here’s the confession, of sorts) there are times in my life that I look around at the people who consider me a friend, and I am just amazed. It’s not that I’m not a good friend. I am fiercely loyal. And, though I have lapses of laziness, I work hard to keep in touch with good friends wherever they may be.
But……well……how do I say this? I’m a bit of a geek sometimes. Plus, I can be a bit pushy with people I’m very comfortable with. Maybe pushy is not the right word. I tend to talk a lot (again with people I know – don’t expect to hear a peep from me until I know you). And I probably talk over people too much. And I’ve seen myself on video. I cringe. I mean, I’m a sincere gal, but I’m a big geek!* The first time I saw myself on video, I thought “Ick! How do my friends put up with me?!” They’re so……so……so NON-geeky! This is probably twice as true for the work friends I’ve made over the years. These guys had no choice but to put up with me through thick or thin in a very, very deadline driven, often stress-full, workplace. But many of us were lucky enough to truly enjoy each others’ company. I used to spend so much of my time outside of work with these folks. Drinks after work. Hiking. Book club. Halloween parties. Dinners. I suppose after spending so much time with them (some of them for almost 10 years now), I shouldn’t be surprised that they like me. But, well….sometimes it surprises me. It’s like – hey! You’re not being paid to spend time with me anymore. What are you doing here? Thinking about it – maybe I should give the most credit to my college and school friends – who had the chance to bolt when they met me, yet didn’t. And then, there is my family. Who, kind of like work folks, are sort of stuck with me. But who are more than just family – they are my friends. Which goes triple for my mom and sister, who are my best friends (along with my Sweetie). Who have been more than family to me for 36 years.
To see all these different parts of my life combine today – grade school, high school, college, work, old family, and new family – was wonderful and humbling. It really brought home how lucky I am, and motivates me to continue to work as hard as I can (harder than I have been lately) to stay in touch with everyone and let them know how important they are to me. To my sister, who made it all happen (today – not the wedding itself – for which I have to thank my Sweetie), THANK YOU!
*I am in no way trying to imply that being a geek is a bad thing, but when I was a kid, it tended to lead to a lonely social life, and that’s just what I was used to. It’s refreshing, as an adult, to learn this isn’t the fate of geeky kids. I wish all kids could learn this at an early age.
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