Archive for January 1st, 2010

The dark quiet hours of the night.  The hazy wasteland of a bright morning.  I see nighttime through the fractured lense of an ocassional insomniac. 

People sleep when I stir.  I doze as others awaken. 

Even the online world is quiet at my normal midnight.  My loved ones certainly are.

Nothing quite so disconcerting as to wake from a short sleep to the vague sensation that the world doesn’t need you.  The late night conversations flow, perhaps thankful of my absence.  The tired sleep, oblivious to my wanderings.  I think of people I wish I could talk to – the ones who will talk.  And who I miss talking to.  But the world is dark.  The night is still.  And I am awake.  Sleep-deprived e-mailing should be avoided as much as drunk calling.  What would one say without the barriers of logical thought and alert restraint?

The dark of night has exclusive hold on feelings and sensations the daylight can vanquish.  A short hall is a halting obstacle course of pointed edges and flitting shadows.  A loneliness born of half dreams and a mind left defenseless by an exhaustion too complete for mere sleep.

You are who you are.  I am who I am.  We do what we do. 

What I feel is real.  Just over-heightened perhaps.  Maybe a little too raw to explain. Maybe a little too sharp to remove from the sheath of quiet expectations and full-rested patience.  It isn’t for most.  And the exceptions are never awake anyway.  It’s enough to make you want to run to the moon.  If I wasn’t so tired, maybe I would.

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Friday Five posted five questions this week.  Check it out over HERE.

1.   We are nosy…..we all wanna know what you got for Christmas. Tell us your favourite gift this year!

No favorite because everyone did a wonderful thing by taking the time and energy to share something with me.  For some, it was the time taken out of their schedule to travel to say hello.  My cousin called me the day before Christmas to wish the best to Sweetie and me.  “Santa” visited two homes and filled two stockings with treats.  I have books to read, movies to watch, honus and socks to wear, music to listen to, and olallieberry syrup to eat.  I had nephews to play with, cousins to talk to, moms to hug, and friends’  company to bask in.  Who could ask for anything more?

2.  What was your best memory of 2009?

A couple of pretty great 40th birthday celebrations and hiking in Yosemite with my hubby are pretty high on the list.

3.  Should auld acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind? What do you think the words to Auld Lang Syne really mean?

What do they really mean?  “We’ve had too much to drink tonight, aaand we are sing-ing LOUDLY.  We don’t know what these words all mean, but we will sing them LOUDLY.”

4.  Have you made a New Year’s Resolution? Have you broken it already?

I don’t make them. 

5.  Choose 1 word to describe the year ahead and make it your mantra for 2010.


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